Modesty Please

I consider myself to have a pretty good sense of humor. For example, last week when Evan seriously straight out asked me if I shaved my butt all I could do was start laughing. Honestly? Did you just ask me that?

Or, for another example, on our drive home from California when we were going through the Sierra Mountains there was a snow storm and we had to stop and put chains on our tires. We pulled off to the side of the road and Evan had eighteen wheelers whizzing past him about 3 feet from his head and going about 60 miles an hour. Was he scared? Oh no, he just looked up at me through the window and yelled

" Could Jordan Hatch do this??"

Okay that's funny too.

But this? This is getting out of hand.

At one time in my life, I may have had a modesty issue okay? I'll admit it.

I wore shorts that did not come to my knees. I wore shirts that were lower than four finger widths below my collar bone. Its true. But then I turned 14 okay people! I promise I have not purposefully been parading around in scandalous get ups purchased from shops named things like "Priscilla McCalls". And while I may have gotten dress-coded a time or two as an EFY goer, that was normal.

But I really started to realize I had a problem when I got dress coded as a counselor. True story. We were getting ready for the banquet on Friday night, and I was meticulously checking the length of all the dresses in my group. I didn't want any of my girls to get sent back to the dorms to change, how embarrassing! So I had just walked all my beautiful young ladies over from the dorms excited for the big dance and trying to be a good example when BAM! My head counselor came over and informed me that my girls were all dressed appropriately, however my dress was too short and I needed to change. Ouch.

But it gets better.

Evan and I joined our ward's inter mural Inner tube Water Polo team this semester. Sounds like a made up sport right? Yeah, that's why I picked it. I was really excited for our first game last week because I've never played inter murals before and I thought it would be a great way for us to get to know the people in our ward a little bit better. Now, yes BYU has a dress code but I figured I've pretty much got it covered at this point. I'm a senior, I'm 22, you would think I could dress appropriately by now. So i suit up in my very tasteful one-piece swim suit and put on some running shorts too just to be extra conservative. But as I lined up with my team the ref looks at me and says "Do you have a t-shirt to wear over that?" Excuse me? I start looking around... Maybe all the girls have to wear t-shirts?

Nope. Not one single other soul has one on.

I look back at her, is she joking? Nope. "The lifeguard will make you put one on." Seriously girl?? There are no holes in this suit, no massive sides cut out, no uncharacteristicly low cut back, it is securely fastened with straps. And it can't possibly be a cleavage issue. Come on, my husband's chest is bigger than mine!

She points to a massive t-shirt sitting on the table next to her that they have prepared for rebel girls like me who apparently missed the modesty memo in life. Awesome. So glad I met the Prophet in this swimsuit. Pretty sure I would have liked to know about the t-shirt rule before that.

So at this point, my modesty struggle has just become comical. Someday I'll master it, but until then I'm praying I have all boys.


  1. HAHAHA! Your life is comical! I thoroughly enjoyed this post and I think that you need to make sure you take the t-shirt they provide home with you because you could start quite the little collection. :) LOVE YOU!

  2. Also, I really enjoy that this post comes right after the post about your husband being a seminary teacher. :)

  3. you know, Cory asked me if I shaved my butt too! such a weird question. i was, are you serious??

  4. boys just have harry butts and dont know how that is possible to..not have one without shaving. haha. Also, the modesty stuff was SO funny! I went back and looked at the picture of you with the prophet. Um, excuse me! that doesnt show cleve at all! jerks. if there was anything wrong is that the girl was jealous that you were cuter than she is.

  5. I can attest to the modestly issues, I witnessed the EFY incident first hand. SC baby. SC!

    The BYU story tops it. Maybe you should get one of these:

    And I got your message on fb about my bra post. LOVE IT!

  6. WOW! I was impressed you had a one piece...shows how modest I am.

  7. That is crazy!!! I hear the wool swimsuits from the 20's are making a come back! Show up in a wet suit! Do they want you to wear a turtle neck!


Post a Comment